Promoting Ass Kissing

Hello, wise leader. Do your people kiss your ass? You may be congratulating yourself if they do. Instead, you should be wondering why nobody respects you.

People do not kiss the ass of their boss because they respect him or his abilities. They kiss his ass because they know that he values ass kissing more highly than good work, honesty, integrity, or intelligence. Is this the "respect" you are looking for? People also kiss ass when they are incompetent themselves.

So is this a slam at ass kissers? No. It's a slam at leaders who like ass kissers. You see, your ass kissers have outsmarted you. They know that the way to keep their jobs is to kiss your ass, not to do good work. They are improving their lives, something I have no quarrel with. I can't blame them for taking advantage of your warped notions of leadership to make their work day go more smoothly and making their continued employment more secure under you. Instead, I blame you for being so ignorant of this obvious result of your monumental ego and your colossal stupidity.

If you are not the top dog in the company (there is somebody above you), then ultimately that person will notice that none of your workers are getting things done, and will talk to you about the terrible performance under your leadership. But don't worry. You can just say that it's hard to find good people, then you simply fire the ass kissers and hire more ass kissers. (Yes, I know that there goes their job security I spoke of, but at least they lasted longer than if they had been expected to do good work.) You control the revolving door, and in many organizations you can avoid responsibility for your total incompetence with this dishonest appearance of making a change while you continue to flush your employer's business down the toilet one day at a time--you can play the blame game, and attribute your failures to everybody and everything besides your own incompetence.. Maybe if all else fails, and you still cannot perform the job you are being paid to do, you can kiss your boss's ass. Yeah, that's the ticket. A whole company full of ass kissers, and no good workers. And if during your next job interview you are asked "Why did you leave your previous position?" you can say, "It was't my fault. The company went bankrupt."